I used to laugh at stories which said "you can fall in love with your best friend" and tell that there's no such things as 'best friends'

It's been about 8 months and 11 days and 9 hours (which makes 34,9 weeks and 9 hours, which makes  244 days and 9 hours, which makes 5865 hours, which makes 351900 minutes, which makes 21114000 seconds) since we became like people in those pictures. 

I'd never considered myself being part of something. I was always leftover, in every relationship I had (was it with my family or with classmates) I felt like I didn't belong there like everyone else did. I never understood how could they blend in so well, but not me - and how could I feel so leftover in every relation I had with other people.

I've had romantic relationships before, but I never felt like I belonged there. I was there for other people, but I didn't feel like they were there for me. I couldn't make myself really trust them, and when I told them how I feel, I felt like I was breaking them. So, I decided left, or I kept my mouth shut and tried to just be there for them, pretend to be so perfect and happy.

First you couldn't stand me. Then we became friends and then I couldn't understand how you could stand me. Sometimes, when I feel awful and down I still don't understand it, but I never doubt that you wouldn't. You've made me realize that it matters what I do or what I say, or what happens if I just leave it and keep my mouth shut. I've never been so happy in my life.

So I love you. I've loved you from the day I said it to you and I still do. You're amazing person and you make me feel alive. I finally feel like I matter to someone. I've never been happier. So even if there is still days when I hate myself and feel like worthless piece of shit, I still remember that you care. That keeps me from falling.

And I know I'm the only one who will love you like this. No one can love you like me. Nobody, even when years pass can love you like I do now at this moment. Because my love for you is different from others, and so is yours. We may someday love somebody else, but not like we love each other. Our love for every person is unique. So there will never be anybody who would love you exactly like me.  But it doesn't matter because we live in this moment and we still have each other.

So. I fell in love with my best friend who didn't like me when we first met. 

I also now feel like I'm part of something and like I belong somewhere. 

Apparently things can change.

pictures form weheartit

maybe today wasn't the most happiest day of our relationship or something, but I realized how much I love you and how much you mean to me, again. I felt it so strongly I just had to write it down somewhere, so here it is.